Spinster Kitchen; Los Angeles, California; June 12, 2008

Sometimes, the Spinsters feel like staying in. But that doesn't necessarily mean they feel like staying sober. Luckily, there are all kinds of pre-made Margaritas-in-bottles from which they can choose.

This evening, the Spinsters sampled the "Jose Cuervo Authentic Classic Lime Made With Jose Cuervo Gold Tequila Premium Margaritas," purchased for $8.99, at the supermarket. That is $8.99 for 750ml of margarita. Oh, the things we consume for you, dear readers, with little to no regard for our hepatic health.

Before we begin the review, it is necessary to note that the label on the bottle tells a tale of wonderful lies about some chick named Rita de la Rosa, whom our extensive research reveals may, or may not, have been Rita Hayworth, who was apparently the inspiration for the creation of the margarita. Upon reading this story, Alexandra decided that her future daughter will be named "Lola Margarita," prompting Amy to make a decision that Alexandra must never, under any circumstances, be allowed to procreate.

Limeyness: Rita Margarita de la Rosa was not big on the limeyness, it seems.

Saltiness: We added our own, to taste. We also debated about adding our own tequila to taste, but realized this would have nullified the decision to go with pre-made margarita.

Presentation: A++, because we did it ourselves, with lime slices, and Alexandra's pretty awesome electric-guitar-shaped ice cubes.

Strength: The Spinsters have consumed stronger glasses of water. However, this kind of margarita does have a place and purpose. If you were planning to consume a lot of margarita at, say, a family reunion, or other such unbearable event, a couple bottles of Rita Margarita de la Rosa's finest would make everything alright. Once you're through the first bottle, the lack of margaritic authenticity would become a moot point. This stuff is also useful if you are a high school girl with plans to attend a backyard bonfire while someone's parents are away, with the goal of getting drunk and losing your virginity to a 12th-grade-boy named Darren, Kyle, or similar.

Texture: Well, the bottle is made of some kind of textured glass, which provides grip if one is swigging.

If this margarita were a movie about Zorro, swarthy hypermasculine horseman, who would play Zorro?
Amy says: Bob Saget. Just bearable for home viewing only. Not meant to be taken out on the town.
Alexandra says: Zac Efron. Good for sixteen year old girls.

Overall Rating: Two out of five tequila worms - because this shit has its purpose.




Until next time, remember: Don't drink anything we wouldn't drink.

Yours,

The Inebriated Spinsters